• overheard conversation

    Children's Support Fund poster. Natasha Christea.

    A clear spring day pleased with warmth and lack of wind. It was even pleasant to stand waiting for the bus, remembering that until quite recently, frosts and slush caused completely different sensations. There were not many people at the stop, the rush hour had already ended and the traffic intervals had clearly increased. A minibus I didn't need drove up, some people left, a few, like me, patiently waited for the next number, looking around without interest.

    The young couple, slowly, approached the passengers who had not yet taken place. It was evident that a pretty, fashionably dressed woman, obviously, proves something to her companion. They both looked no older than thirty. The words were not yet distinguishable, but her right hand with an open palm energetically made chopping movements in support of some words.
    They approached, stood a little apart from the people, but they did not speak in a whisper, but in such a way that, if not to everyone, then at least to the people closest to them, it was not difficult to hear them.

    No, aren't you a man? - the young lady continued to ask with some aggression, - You don’t know how to hold the belt in your hand? Wrap the end around your hand and whip it with a buckle, not like you did yesterday! What was that? What do you think is the punishment?
    A tall, lean man, as if hiding his height, stooped and, with some embarrassment, tried to object:
    - Well, she was in pain, she was screaming anyway, you saw ...
    - Did it hurt her? Don't make me laugh, she didn't even have a trace left. She screamed! Yes, she took it as a joke. She also squeals on the carousel. Found a clue! - she looked sideways at the standing people and added a little quieter, - Do you understand that you can completely spoil the child like that?
    - In terms of? - Her husband asked in bewilderment, apparently.
    - And in the sense that if at the word spanking her hamstrings will not shake, then you won’t get through with anything later. She will decide that if she endured for the first time, then there is nothing wrong with that. I know this well, unlike you.
    - But I can't do that, Vika! She's small and a girl too. Here you go and flog her, if you so desire.
    - I can do it, but it should be done by the father, not the mother. My mother not only never laid a finger on me, but also stopped my father when she saw that the offense was not great. Because my father, if he fought me, he fought so much. To blood and to bruises all over the ass. And not like you: he folded the strap, slapped it for appearance and decided that he had fulfilled his duty. And in the morning she began to be rude to me again. I'd rather forgive a deuce than this. If she behaves like this for ten years, then what will happen next ?! No, it won't work like that! Today, you hear, pour it in, as I told you!
    - Vic, the bus is coming!
    - It's not ours. Answer me, do you understand?
    The man put his head back on his shoulders and, with the air of a beaten dog, said softly:
    - I don't know, Vic, honestly, how can I beat her to bruises?! Yes, she will hate me later, and I myself, too, believe me.
    The wife smiled and ruffled her husband's hair with her hand:
    - Stupid, do I treat my father badly? I was offended, of course, when he beat me, but I grew up and realized that he was right. What, did he raise me badly? Maybe a bad wife came out of me? Say so!
    - Good! - He stretched and kissed her affectionately on the cheek, - It's better not to find it!
    - You see now! And if you can't, don't worry. The main thing is that you, on the contrary, do not get carried away with this, because I know how it happens.
    - What are you talking about? - the head of the family asked in bewilderment and with some suspicion.
    - You know Nina, my friend?!
    - I know of course.
    - So. Her father, when she and I were still in elementary school, also, like you, blew off dust particles from his daughter. And then one story happened ... - a young woman giggled somehow like a girl and interrupted the story, as if not knowing whether to tell further.
    - What's the story? Tell me, time will go faster!
    “I don’t even know how to explain this to you?” We were already in the sixth grade. Girls at this age have all sorts of troubles, well, do you understand what I mean ?! Nina and I became friends from the first grade, after school she used to run to my house, then I to her. They kept no secrets from each other. She knew that I was punished with a belt for my faults. At first she just sympathized, then she became more and more curious. What is it like to receive a belt on the pope? I didn't experience this myself, so I asked:
    - Are you yelling or suffering? Aren't you ashamed to lie in front of your dad with a bare butt? Well, in general, everything is in this spirit. Sometimes they even spanked me in order to get a response. Well, I got tired of it somehow, and I suggested to her, but, they say, do you really want to be punished? Like this? - she asks. And so, I say, today you grabbed a deuce, and even lied to the teacher that you forgot your diary at home. My father would have spanked me for half an hour for such a thing. And I suppose only your mother will scold you? Well, yes, she nods. Now imagine that I am my dad and you are me. Presented? Presented, answers. You will punish me now, right? She asks, and she blushes to her ears. How else, - I answered her, - come on, bring the belt here! Here she entered a stupor. What kind of belt, he asks, if he is in daddy's trousers, daddy is at work, and we don’t have another belt in the house? I thought a little and came up with. Do you remember, she says, Svetka told us that they whip her at home with jump ropes, but it hurts so much?! Jumping can give! Okay, I agree, give me your jumping ropes. Let's try, but if anything, I'll run home and bring my own belt, individual, because my father has another one for trousers.
    She brings jumping ropes familiar to me from the hallway. It's okay, they turned out to be biting. Take off, I order her, panties and lie down on your stomach. She lay down and waits.


    I tried on, I myself became curious, before that they only whipped me, but I myself didn’t have anyone. In short, she swung, as my father did, and hit her on the buns. She squealed, rolled off the couch, rubs her ass. Fool, screaming, it hurts! This is where I burst out laughing. She cries and I laugh. You yourself wanted to test yourself, I say, weakling! Then her pain seemed to have subsided, she perked up, and replies that it was her from surprise. Come on, he says, continue, now I will endure. But I immediately realized that her patience would only be enough for one blow, so I pulled out a cloth belt from some kind of dressing gown and tied her legs so that it was difficult to kick. She put her hands behind her back, pressed her to her shoulder blades and began to walk around. She breaks out, and some kind of anger takes me - I try to whip even harder. In short, she slashed her from the waist to the knees, then she came to her senses, let go of her hands. Everything, I say, you are forgiven, get up. And she, know yourself, roars. I'm no longer friends with you, screaming - go away! Well, I went home, and I myself had some kind of foreboding. I obviously overdid it.

    And exactly. As Ninka later told me, in the evening my parents came home from work: this and that - everything was as usual. Only this fool was in a dressing gown, and this dressing gown barely covered her knees, so her mother accidentally noticed a trace from a skipping rope on her leg. What is it, she asks you, but she lifted the hem. And on the thighs there are bruises in the form of loops. She nearly fell off her chair in shock. Why yes from where? Well, she gave out that, they say, my girlfriend and I played like, like, mother's daughters. What started here! Her mother attacked Nina's father. I, screaming, told you that severity should at least sometimes be shown. Now take a belt and knock out a wedge with a wedge, and I will go now to Vika's parents.
    In short, when the doorbell rang, my heart immediately skipped a beat, I realized that I was now unhappy. And sure enough, on the threshold of Ninkin's mother showed up and began to slander me. Father, not listening for long, right in front of her began to flog me. I scream that it’s not my fault that she herself asked me, and you know, he whips and whips, only says: “Do you like the toy? Here's more, here's more!" Ninka's mother did not wait for the end of the spanking, she hurried home. My father left me for a minute, walked her to the door, and gave all the advice on what needs to be done now. Then he returned and continued to spank me from the place where he started. But not so much anymore, and even began to laugh at our fun with Ninka.

    Well, girlfriend, probably, also flew in? asked her husband, already listening with interest to her story.
    - Not the word, flew in! While her mother was with us, her dream came true - her father poured a belt on her ass. But apparently not enough. Because when his wife returned, all excited and even under the impression of what she saw was not a weak spanking, she made him take the belt back in his hands and spank Ninka the way my father spanked me. In general, the next day, both of us could hardly squat and sat on chairs, like old women, slowly and carefully. And when Nina had to get up to answer something to the teacher, I noticed how her buttocks were trembling in a cramp. And this meant that the friend received the full program, and, apparently, it could not have done without a buckle. Changes were easier. We stood, as if looking out the window, and pretended that everything was in order with us. True, Ninka did not talk to me for two whole days, but seeing that I was suffering just like her, she could not stand it and told me everything. We made up, but for a friend, the worst was just beginning.

    Why?
    - Since that day, Ninka's father, apparently, got a taste. And where did the former good daddy go?! For deuces, Nina began to receive a belt regularly, and since she studied much worse than me, a rare week passed with her without punishment. And if you add that all the comments in the diary were equated with deuces, then you yourself understand that her butt was constantly glowing with all the colors of the rainbow. When we were already high school students, her father began to use a rubber boot instead of a belt.

    What are you? For what?
    - He took a rubber boot with a molded sole in his hand and beat his daughter with a heel on her thighs until she was bruised. And then he warned her that if someone, especially at a medical examination, asks where the bruises come from, then she will have to say that some hooligans beat her on the street. My father whipped me for the last time before I turned sixteen - I tried to smoke, and he smelled it. Then he said that he had become big, and he was already ashamed to make suggestions to me with a belt, it’s time, they say, to understand what’s what. And Ninka's father beat her almost before her wedding. She was in a hurry to get married, apparently because of this. Do you understand why I told you this?
    The husband paused, nodded his head and said thoughtfully:
    - Seems to be yes. Do you really think I'm capable of becoming like your friend's father?
    - I mean, do not promise, but try to control yourself. Men are characterized by cruelty, and she can wake up completely unexpectedly.
    - I don't understand you now, Vika. You yourself demand from me that I beat my daughter like a Sidorov goat, and at the same time, you say that the men are sadists.
    - I did not say that all sadists. I just want you to become, at least a little, like my father and at the same time not turn into such a stupid dad who does not understand anything in education, who beats not in order to correct, but because he began to like the process itself and he drags himself from it. Understood?
    The man sighed.
    - Yes, I understand, Vic, you, I understand! Just why should I have to choose between your father and your friend's father. Am I dissatisfied with the way I am?
    - In many ways, you are satisfied, but there should be a man in the house in all respects, and not just as a loving husband. Are you a loving husband?
    - Are you still in doubt? He reached out again to kiss his wife.
    “That’s good,” she coquettishly clung to him and added, “now we’ll come home, and while I’m preparing dinner, prove to me and Nastya that we have a strict dad, and he knows how to use a belt if necessary. By the way, here is our bus.

    They sat down and left. I was not on my way with them.
    My heart felt a little bad. It seemed that I should have felt pity only for the girl Nastya, who was unfamiliar to me, but for some reason, I felt more and more sorry for the husband of this self-righteous woman, who, as I understood, since her childhood, diligently copied her father in practice education and punishment of children.

    P.S.
    “About two million children under the age of 14 are beaten by their parents, 50,000 children run away from home every year to escape domestic violence…” Yulia Mikhailova, Chairwoman of the Family and Childhood Protection Center of the All-Russian Creative Movement “Russian Lad” “Everything is the best? Children? (“Pravda Moskvy”. 17.08.11).

    And this means that every day five and a half thousand children in Russia receive spanking and beatings in the family. Every hour, right now, over two hundred children are crying or screaming in pain, maybe in the next house or outside your room.
    “Two-thirds of those beaten are preschoolers. 10% of the brutally beaten and hospitalized children die. The number of beaten children is growing every year. According to surveys of human rights organizations, about 60% of children experience violence in the family, and 30% in schools (“MK” 16.04.05).

    November 2011

    A sad continuation of the theme: Traditions are holy, or a poem about spanking

    Spanking for Achievement in Sports: "The Unkind Old Skipping Rope"
    "Three rods against a rapier"


    Vladislav 21.10.2018 23:31:39

    What does not happen in the life of a teenager. In the 7th grade, suddenly, my dad whipped me for two pairs. Suddenly, because before I was not punished for grades and was not flogged at all. And here, for the first time, he forced to lower his underpants and beat him painfully. I did not expect such a shame and could not look into the eyes of my parents. Quietly he got ready and without saying anything left for his aunt - his mother's sister. She greeted me warmly and caressed me. I got emotional and told her everything as it happened. She clearly sympathized, but said that, nevertheless, she would call her parents. Mom arrived soon after. She said that dad was in trouble at work and he broke loose. She persuaded me to go home. I expected dad to be angry, but he remained silent. When I was already going to bed, he came in and said that he was wrong, that I was already a big guy and it was impossible to do this to me, that this would not happen from his side in the future. But, he asked me to take a step towards him - he promised not to receive more deuces. I readily promised. I didn't immediately realize how difficult it was. It cost me a lot of effort. However, I am surprised at myself, until graduation from school I did not receive more than a single deuce.

    Gennady Dergachev 10/22/2018 09:11:08

    Thank you, Vladislav, for sharing and telling a case from your life, which, I must say, is very instructive in that the parents behaved diplomatically and were able to turn everything that happened to the benefit of both you and yourself. 13-14 years old is a very difficult age, and conflicts with parents often turn into irreconcilable states, among them leaving home. And this is a big problem, according to statistics: children sometimes disappear forever if they do not have relatives to whom they can come for a while. You are lucky with this. Now it is difficult to compare how it was and is without statistics. In Soviet times, the spanking of children in families was so common and familiar that it could anger someone only if it was carried out with particular cruelty, but I probably won’t be mistaken if I say that in the middle classes, 80 percent of children were episodically flogged, and the flogged themselves did not find anything tragic in this fact. But there were, for example, in my 6th-7th grade boys and girls in the amount of 4-5 people who were flogged very sensitively several times a week: but public opinion on the part of teachers and other parents sounded passive: "So flog, of course, already too much, but the child does not need a hospital, which means that there is no point in raising other people's children! - Yes, now such children have gone, that it’s impossible for them to be different! - others added. The word "now", as I see, continues to be relevant every day for decades, or rather, centuries! :(In general, in most cases everything is very individual: both punishments, and results after punishments, and consequences ... There is probably no general recipe and cannot be: a flogged generation no worse and no better than the unworn - crimes are committed, immorality does not disappear, humanism is selective, not universal - such are people as long as they are people, not biorobots!
    Rice. Richard Boynton

    CM 22.01.2018 20:04:16

    Liked!

    Semyon 15.01.2018 18:32:20

    They write a lot of nonsense about spanking. Here, theories and excursions into psychology are useless. Everything is very simple. Boys need to be punished. There is nothing to be original with devices - a regular belt is good. I know this from myself. My father fought until the age of 16. I also guide my stunner with a belt from time to time. I don't think it should be done more than once a month. The boy is already 15. He suffers spanking - for more than a year he has not screamed or cried. He doesn’t even ask for forgiveness - he pouts and is silent. I see an imp in the eyes, I want to disobey him: do not lower your pants, do not give in, but for now. afraid. He knows that for resistance you can get extra heels (or even more) especially hot. I think it will be necessary to set aside the belt as it turns 16.

    Gennady Dergachev 16.01.2018 12:20:39

    You say that everything is very simple, but human simplicity leads to different results, it is not for nothing that there is an English and Russian proverb: "Simplicity is worse than theft." If there is an act, there is also its psychology. Is it possible to do without psychology? Of course, no matter how you can do without a belt! But it’s easier to dot the i with a belt, as long as there is more physical strength than the punished, and in the future, how life goes: it’s written with a pitchfork on the water, although many still believe the prescribed belt :) It’s hard to predict other people’s actions, maybe spanking will really go to your son for the benefit (I drive this phrase, probably, into the horror of foreign juvenile justice), and maybe when he gets independence, it will cause the emergence of not those views on life and actions that you now instill in him. There is an opinion that you need to know the horse you are betting on well, but mister chance very often makes such bets losing. But most importantly, we must not forget about another danger: your son may begin to apply the same method of education to his children (as you are now), if he has them, and where is the guarantee that he knows the “norm” and will not detect the child to death ? There are such cases, there are statistics - that's actually what worries, watching and hearing that aggression in people is not decreasing, but, it seems, even increasing, you have to peer more sharply at others, and decide for yourself the question: is it not they have the vice of inadequate behavior (in horse breeding they say - breaking :))
    Thanks for the review!

    This story happened to me
    Once I got the first deuce, I was 14 years old. She came home as if nothing had happened, all in tears. Dad was in the kitchen. I quickly ran past him. He noticed me.
    I immediately sat down for lessons. After a while, dad came to my room to ask why I didn’t come to dinner.
    I took my diary and opened it, I was very scared
    He started screaming what it is, I burst into tears.
    "Sorry, I won't do it again," I said.
    He told me to take off my pants and lie on his knees. I went to bed. At first he began to be on the bare pope with his hands, it was very painful and I cried. I counted the blows. He gave me 48 hits and left the room. I thought it was all over, but after 7 minutes he entered the room with his army belt, I got scared and burst into tears, he said lie down on the sofa, I did not take off my pants and lay down. He did 24 hits and took off my pants. I was wearing only panties. He continued, he saw that on the 12th beat I was still holding on and finally took off my panties
    I screamed dad don't.
    He continued. I cried a lot and asked to be cut. With a belt he rocks me for about 30 minutes.
    - Get up, he said.
    I barely got up
    - Wait for me here.
    I knew that this was not all. I could not sit down, because my ass hurt. I cried a lot and waited for what would happen next.
    My dad came into my room 20 minutes later. He had thin sticks (rods) in his hands. I threw myself on his neck and asked for forgiveness. He took me and led me to the sofa, took off my pants and set to work. I cried a lot
    The next day, in the morning, I went to the table. My parents, as if nothing had happened, wished me Good Morning. I wished them the same. After breakfast, my dad took me to school. I burst into tears in the car after yesterday, because there was no living place on my pope. Dad began to calm me down
    And he told me that for every prank, even for small ones, I would receive a belt. He said that he was also whipped in childhood, stronger than he whipped me yesterday. Then he hugged me

    Gennady Dergachev 13.01.2017 20:25:21

    These fantasies, which do not stand up to scrutiny, are completely out of place here. You do not need to be a professional psychologist to distinguish real events from fiction. Of course, I could delete your not quite review, but I don’t have the habit of sweeping someone else’s “garbage”, forgive me for being blunt.

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